A Fresh Breath Of Rectal Air

Oh yeah it's true. A mite disarming if not outright rude and here we're barely past breakfast. It seems that rectal breathing is now a thing. I'm not sure why that would be a thing but, it is. Here's the actual link to the ridiculous side of science -

https://scitechdaily.com/no-joke-pigs-and-rodents-can-breathe-through-their-butts/ 

Why in hell would anyone need to know IF pigs breathe through their butts? I haven't a clue. It would seem that science has way too much research money to spend foolishly and scientists have way too much time on their hands. For ridiculous research. So pigs and mice can breathe through their butts. Damn if that's not about a comedy gold mine. So would breathing air through the butt smell like a fart? Would one need an air freshener to breathe through the butt? Febreze will have an entirely new market to freshen up the money. You'll be able to freshen your kitchen so it smells like ass. Scientists took valuable time out of the researching allotment of time for sciencey research to give credibility to the notion that pigs and mice enjoy rectal breathing. It's perfectly fine to have a face-in-palm moment right about now. It might take a major act of yoga enhanced back bending with a twist of enjoy a face-in-ass moment. You know, I've heard about people that have their heads jammed up their ass. See trump for the classic powerpoint presentation on head-up-ass syndrome. You had to know that was coming. Respiratory therapy people are going to have to open up an entirely new line of therapeutic respiration. Therapist to patient, "okay now just relax while we duct tape your face and then breathe deeply through your butt." Sounds like authentic respiration therapy to me. Holding you breath will take on an entirely new meaning. Farting in an elevator will become acceptable and no longer a social taboo. Excuse me folks I'm just having a deep breath of ass air. I'd bet the elevator will still clear out in a blink. Just when you think there is no longer anything funny in our world and along comes this little scientific nugget of pure asinine absurdity. I mean...what the fuck?!? We'll dispense with the holding of breath on this fine Saturday and get to the machine art. I know any number of politicians that talk out their ass. Would that be in the same venue? Science might research that oddity.

Mr. Fingers -

pair n thetical surrealism -

did you know that fish can breath under water and without the use of their butts. :}