2020 - a year of crisis

yes my friends, humanity is faced with yet another crisis that may in fact transcend all other crises the people of Earth have had to deal with in the year of the rat. a worse crisis than trump vs Biden. a worse crisis than any drought, earthquake, hurricane, monsoon, gout, typhoon, or the silly-ass president of the philippines. crisis major 2020 and the International Space Station stinks. I mean the place reeks bad enough to bring tears to the eyes of the innocently unprepared for 20 years of dead skin cells, showers once a week, no privacy when using the space toilet, or a spring cleaning of any manner. nope not even once. they can't open the dang doors or windows. opening the aforementioned could quite possibly be a really bad thing. so science gets all manner of giddy when the space station comes up in polite conversation but the scientists never EVER mention the in general rancid funk that permeates the atmosphere aboard the ISS. not even raw chicken, garlic, and onions rotting in an old garbage can come close to the aromatic pollution that our Planet's astronauts must live in. for days at a time to be specific. sometimes months and even years. well, just a shade longer than a year. long enough to get acclimatized to living in a stink can. this is serious folks and we the people of Planet Earth must do something, anything we can to aid our space heroes in their time of nasal distress. so here's what we do. start a go-fund-me page to rake in a basket load of cash for aiding our aromatically spoiled space station. any go-fund-me page money raised could buy a half decent Dyson vacuum. I only mention a Dyson vacuum on account of I bought one of those for my wife and she really likes the Dyson a lot. my wife say the old Dyson really sucks. no pun intended. then with the go-fund-me page cash-o-la, we purchase a couple of half decent space curtains so the astronauts can have a little privacy while they do their business in space. then and this is the real important part of any plan to aid our intrepid space sojourners, we purchase a several years supply of Febreeze. pack the Febreeze up nice and nifty tight, load the aforementioned Febreeze and other vitally necessary items on one of any number of usable if not functional space freighters, and launch the care package up to the International Space Station with some instructions on how the astronauts should use the Febreeze in sufficient quantity to quell the stench of twenty years in space. a vacuum should prove useful as well. people of Earth owe it to our noble astronauts to provide all the necessary materials needed to make living in space a livably fresh proposition. the people of earth salute you the astronauts. to infinity and beyond the next space truck stop. now it's time for some experimental machine art and stuff.

what is that smell -

someone made a hood ornament with my name on it. go figure -

to boldly go where the stench ain't quite so bad. :]